Relax, Don’t Do it
I got screwed. There, I said it.
I had been too afraid or upset to talk about some issues I was having at work. I think a part of me was still frustrated with how things were dealt with as well as the fact that I was really getting no recognition for the work I had been doing. A couple of my supervisors apologized for the former. Basically, I wasn’t chosen for a higher position I was vying for earlier in the year. It didn’t really upset me that I wasn’t picked. What really upset me was the way in which the process was handled since ultimately the person for the position (assuming it’s not me) would be my superior and I had been closed out from the whole process. I understood the conflict of interest in picking the person but I didn’t fully understand the need to be so secretive and inconspicuous about the process.
Anyway, the fact was that I was not chosen – for better or for worse. I was told on a Friday which meant I spent the weekend in my cocoon, letting the anger build-up inside me. On Monday, I returned to work very bitter. A part of me wanted to get “even.” But what did that mean? Not do work and screw myself over even more? I came home at night and realized how petty I was being. Typically when a person doesn’t get a fair shake, they want retribution – and fast. It’s the easy way out. But you just feel worse since you’re not dealing with the root of the issue. I realized I couldn’t and shouldn’t allow this to get me down. I came to terms with what happened (and I believe that all things happen for a reason). In fact, instead of it being a dampening experience I’m using it as fuel to take me further and work harder to do what I’m good at.